Photobucket

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

not a good day

I've been really emotional the last couple of days, I had a cry fest on Sunday, i haven't cried like that since Feb 14th. I thought i was ok or better, i though i had finally gotten stronger, man was I wrong. I am back down to feeling broken and just shattered. AF is nowhere in sight but 3 consecutive BFN's are just a big blow to me, telling me how much my body is falling me again and a reminder that if i had some chance before it is now cut by 50% since i have only one tube left. I know a healthy pg can happen with only one tube but i still feel so devastated.
I know i will never let go of my angels, but some days are so much harder than others and i just wish i had my 5 month belly or 9weeks with the second.
Just a bad couple of days all around and i 'm really feeling sorry for myself. I am dreading having AF show up since it will be another slap in the face that the clomid didn't do squat.

3 comments:

Amy (TheGiggleWorm) said...

Vivian - I am sorry you are having a hard time right now.

Stay strong :)

Amanda said...

It's perfectly okay to have days where we want to cry! Thinking of you! {HUGS}

Fit & Fierce Mama said...

I'm sorry, Viv. I think we were really close in pregnancy with your first and my only. It's aways on my mind and some days I have to let it out and cry. ((hugs))